Ah. Just had a very.. huge dinner. Went 'makan' shopping at the buka puasa stalls near SS14 in Subang Jaya. Still having that migraine. Left the office at 4pm cause Jason was in one of his foul moods again. He knocked (or nearly smashed it into bits) the receiver of the phone when Wai Leng was on the other side of the line. I had just received some mock up of the cover of the magazine and had left it on the chair opposite him for him to look at - and he just didn't want it there.
It was all because of the god damned 'mesh' material backdrop of some bloody CIBA(i) Vision roadshow. Mesh material is those.. kinda.. PVC thingy material with 'breathable' holes in it and Mr Yap had made a mess out of it. The client's logo could not be seen.. although everyone claims that someone or another had seen another version of the same print out of the same material and it didn't look like shit. Something wrong with his printer or it could even be our files - no one will ever know, i guess. Jason called Mr Yap up and started using foul language - and he insisted that Mr Yap reprinted the buntings and backdrops. Serves Mr Yap right. I have had enough of his nonsense.
And it was also because of the eyeballs.
.. ... ... It's a long story.. so let me start at.. ..
*pardon the spelling of the labels.. Sky did this. hehe*~an original p@ssion-@rt.... in a far.. far.. away galaxy.. (about a month ago i think... on earth.. if i could recall..). there was this ... silly girl... who had thought that an acquaintance of hers would be thrilled if she had offered him a position that he could not resist in her gay little company. The young and gay spirited man, namely Sky... (and many had asked me why he was named sky.. to which i would reply.. why don't you ask Sky?)
And so this young little Sky had a time of his life...( that's for the first few hours into his job, actually) going about with his little business of his new posting.. .. when he received a call saying that there were bigger fish to catch 6 floors below with a pay rise!... and so.. 28 days later ... the young fisherman dropped the tiny aquarium that he was working on at that particular moment.. and left for the bigger aquarium across the street.
And now.. the tiny.. sad.. miserable aquarium.. sat moping beneath the swivel chair.. next to the clear plastic dustbin which held (or 'is holding') the innards of the tank (water to test if the aquarium leaks)... maybe aedes mosquitos would breed there and kill everyone in the office.. muahahaha)....
And why was it moping, you ask? Well... this little aquarium was to be used in a simulation (Wai Leng would have put it 'stimulation'... she would confidently proclaim to the client that the said 'stimulation' was a very attention seeking roadshow object) to simulate that Brand CIBA(i) Vision's contacts lenses absorbs 5x more oxygen compared to normal brands contact lenses. Dear Sky had glued the air tubes to its base the day before and well... quite frankly.. it was plastic surgery gone wrong!... but no fear... the eyeballs were not there yet... so it didn't look as ridiculous.
Come Monday... the dreaded roadshow day... the silly little girl whom you at heared of at the beginning of the story had to draw eye pupils on white sprayed toilet flush... pump balls... Yes... The floating black ball that you find when you open the lid of a toilet flush?... Yes... those.. Two of them. Sprayed white by dear sky.
And so as the Boss was touching up on the lining of the outer eye pupil, the little girl was warming up the glue gun to stick the (&@*#^ eyeballs to the bottom of the tank onto the little rubber air tubes but in the end gave the glorious opportunity to the Boss to handle the firearm as she had no energy to squeeze the bloody gun trigger.
And then the problems started.
(Day One) 1st hour of Eyeballs in Tank 2 cute guys had filled up the tank with water and everything looked FAB. Then left eyeball floated up with the bubbles cause the end of the string was not glued properly to air tube. Boss tried sticking it back with glue gun.. but not before cursing the glue gun. Filled tank with water again.. and then the eyes started to go cross eyed.. and then the right eye popped out of its... string.. and floated gaily up with bubbles. Boss made the little girl take the tank back to the office.
(Day One) 10 hours after floating eye(s) incidentBoss made Steve buy 10 packets of elephant glue. Boss drowned end of strings with super glue. Poor little girl had to prod strings into place while getting high on glue fumes with stray pen found from someones table. At 2am in the morning, little girl was struggling with glue gun to make sure bloody ball stays stuck. Boss had cursed the glue gun again but insisted that it was better than nothing. (no wonder the god damned thing would not work properly - the Boss had hurt its 'fillings'! (feelings) )
(Day Two) 8 pmBalls were much too attached to the rubber tube... and decided that the tube needed a ride to the surface of the water.. and so.. the entire contraption.. tubing, bubbles and balls... were floating merrily in the aquarium. Boss had then concluded that there were too much air in the balls... so air had to be let out to avoid screw up.
Boss made little girl hold each ball, so that he could poke holes in them... .. with a screwdriver. Boss also told little girl not to be stupid when little girl pointed out that holes were too small to let any air out.. and still would pull tube up - but little girl shrugged and told herself that Bosses always knows best and kept her little mouth shut. This time, Boss only emptied 6 tubes of elephant glue onto base of aquarium to keep tube secure.
(Day Three) 3pmRegional Manager of Ciba(i) Vision came along... to see if the eye balls were in working condition.. All had seem so well.... .. she was crossed eyed... and the duo eyeballs were also having a romantic session of 'lets stare at each other and see who blinks first - well... we'll just have to wait and see which one of us would grow an eyelid first.. '
until... ..
Up popped the left eyeball.. and did the breast stroke around the aquarium (as per described by the Boss - little girl was trying not to laugh, it did sound extremely hillarious)... not giving two toots about about stares that it was getting. And ignoring the feeble waves its ex-attachment = the string, as it solemnly bid goodbye.. its strands tickling the giggling bubbles - half its lenght as it should have been.. as there were too much air in the ball.. (holes were too small it seems... couldn't let any air out... .. hmmmmm... why didn't anyone think of that???) and the force of the tug had ended its merry career... 'stimulating' college students at roadshows.
And the little girl lived happilly.. ever.. after... .. .. duh.
~The End~
