d.e.e.p thro@t

*zoom in to take closer look at my GIANT stick*
~an original p@ssion-@rt

Yes. I came into the office this morning, and Elly offered me a giant stick. Hmm... how did she know I needed .... .. hm. Nevermind.

... .. *blinks... licks her lips*.. ... Uumm.. ... .. what's william doing now by the way.... hmmmm...

.. *blinks... blinks*.........

.... ........ YYYYAaaaaarrrrrrrr... But anyway. It was quite tasty. Chocolate coated, thick, yummy....... er..... .... what was I talking about again?... Ahhhh yes.. the Giant Stick. It's biscuit by the way. A giant stick of.. ...

.. .. .. Hm. I took another look at the picture.. and I see the scissors next to it. And my trusty stapler, and that china bulk made standard office issued retarded pen. All a threat to the giant stick..

Anyway.. today was quite uneventful. I did my phone claims, applied for leave for this Friday. Taking my mummy to the Sound of Music concert down in KL. And I am also taking out my darling's mummy out on Sunday to Amcorp Mall. She wants to run away from her in-laws and do some.. .. girlie.. mummie... er... antique shopping with her.. .. son's.. girlfriend... .. or... daughter-in-law or.. .. whatever i am to her.

And i really need to clean my table up here.. at the office. The amount of.. ... .. things.. God... how did they end up here. .. Hmmm.. Cleo Bachelors of the year 2005...

*blinks... looks around.. flicks... flicks... flipp..... *... ooooohhh laa llaaa.... check out those fab abbbss.... and those bunsss...

.. *blinks*.. .. *ahem*.. *straightens her collar*.. ddaaaammnn.... of all frustrations.. why does it have to be this 'particular' nenenenene one!!

.. . *ahem*... fffooccccuuussssssss...

*glow of richness .. ohh.. another lie of mine.. *
~an original p@ssion-@rt

Yes.. this is my effort to try and stay focused... ....

Oh yar.. I took that picture for the KLCC poster for Christmas. It was hot, stuffy, surrounded with lime green and turquoise walls did not help at all. With the candles lighted and ... praying that it won't burn down the cloth that i had so painstakingly cellophane taped onto the wall. (the paint peeled off, but it ain't myyy walll). And I had one feet on the chair to keep me stable, in my mini skirt. My hands were shaky and this was one of the 'mistakes'. I had lost balance and my finger accidentally pressed the shutter. And it came out Greeeaat!... Haha. Speak about 'candid shots'. Candid behind the camera!..

.. ... .. okkaayy.. putting in too much effort. .. ... ..

.. nenenenene here i come!... ...

missing h.i.m

Okay. Today at work, it turned out to be a pretty good one. Waltzed into the office at 9:00am again, I had never reached work at 8:30am for a very long time now - trying to get the 'never-early-to-work' award now. In my new Topshop denim mini skirt and a t-shirt. I had never worn a t-shirt to work since Gina had ticked me off for wearing beach sandals and a tank top - because my boss thinks that her company is near international standards ... .. (.. "Oh.... you know... when I went to visit DKNY, everyone was in elegant suits and ties... !"... )

Yaaaarrrrrrrr... if you could even pay us quarter of what the people over there were getting, I'd wear a lime green tutu with Ronald McDonald's shoes and couple that up with his nose too.. *thinks*.. and maybe one of those Madonna pointed bras.. thingy-majigs .... in fluorescent orange.

.... *pppfffttttt* International Standards, my arse.... (a cute one, mind you.. )

30 minutes later, curled up comfortably with my Milo and.. .. some.. sticky biscuit.. thing.. cut in.. small squares.. with.. .er.. honey and peanuts (called Sek Ke Ma in Chinese - bought it at Petaling Street on Sunday. I have been addicted to it since very young. I guess it's the amount of nibbling involved. I like nibbling on stuff.) - I looked at the calendar and wwwooo hhhaaayyyy... it's the 28th of March already!. 9 more working days to go before I am history in the blasted company!!...

Then my darling came back from his lunch and I started.. ... .. teasing him.. with.. weird .. kinky, naughty-yet-innocent scenarios that I had playing in my dirty mind while nibbling on the sticky treat. Blue butterfly T-shirt, with denim micro mini skirt, a blue butterfly clip in my hair and a 'hunger' (that nothing could cure) made me feel like a university student again - and I couldn't resist teasing my innocent loverboy - yaarrr... but the plan kinda backfired and I couldn't concentrate on my work after that. But it was a good 'work out' to perk up my Monday morning.

Started sorting out my stock pictures that I had taken and came across something that I had kept for laughs. Check out the piece of twisted metal.... and errrr..... retarded.. squashed ring.

*made in China*
~an original p@ssion-@rt

Yes. I know the colour is gordy. It ain't my design. As you can see, the... choker... necklace thingy has broken... into a few pieces. The right most break was done by me. I tried to salvage it with a little bit of chewing gum (but yarrr... things like that don't work in real life, it only works in cartoons yarr.. so don't try this at home) . I had accidentally yanked it too hard from another chain - actually.. the other 'chain' could be called a piece of .. string. Then the break near the ring was... er.. God knows how it got there. It was.. just there when I saw it on the tray. And the piece of separated .. metal (it's not a necklace anymore) broke completely off I think when Gina tried it on. And she just left it on the tray. Maybe someone would come along and stick more heavy duty chewing gum on it. And she would even make sure that the chewing gum was .. copper coloured. Ew.

And the ring, it's.. lopsided... near to the point of breaking. Maybe she had sat on it .. or.. something. Or she was experimenting how far would her low quality stuff could... bend without breaking. She might have even sneezed and then entire thing would fly apart. (hopefully killing her in the process... MUAHAHAHA.... .. .. )

.. ... ... .. *ahem*

Yes. And I.. In order to portray the 'best' of the company products, managed to.. un-squash the ring (it broke after i took the picture), and.. rearranged the mangled parts together.

*liesss... lies.. all liesss!*
~an original p@ssion-@rt

Yes. The biggest lie ever. My job is to tell people lies that Axxezz' products are the best. And I have to admit that I am a rather professional liar. Hehe. Look at it!... You can't even see the retarded part of the ring nor the pathetic iron twisted.. choker... part.. thingy.

... Oh yeah.. I'm good. Oh yeah.. oh yeah.. *shakin' her booty* (does the Ilama dance from 'The Emperor's Groove' Disney cartoon - go watch it, it's hilliarious)

And and andddd.... Uma, the snorting Operations Manager.. is leaving the company for another international branded retail company next Friday too!. Har Har Har. Let's just see how Miissss Farked Up Boss copes up without her little puppet to play with. Hope she cries. And get her shoes stuck in a pool of sticky uncrunchy (nah.. don't waste the good bits on her) stale, peanut butter.... and fall flat on her pretty little face.. and boobs.. and SQUASH em!!...

.. .. ... *ahhhem*..

And... I got a call for a second interview at this events company. I think I'll definately score for this one. The guy who was at the first interview seemed very keen in my portfolio and experience - either that or he was interested in my other 'assets'. But however, it's a good.. deal. I guess. 2 minutes from my house, a 700 dollar pay hike and being the new operations manager. Sounds good, eh?. Heh. Definately better than this mad house.

And they are having a farewell party for darling me next Friday. Yaaaarrr... ... Farewell BoZoS!!...

And.. I miss my love. He called on Saturday. . . It was so nice hearing from him again... .. *siggghhssss*... .. I'm sorry people, I just love him so much. So.. so.. so... .. much. *muahs*.

th@nk you, Lord, for e.@.s.t.e.r

7:15am, the choir were already singing their last hymn. As I stood there, overlooking the field where many.. many Sunrise Services had been held - in the vicinity of the old Wesley Methodist Church in the heart of Kuala Lumpur - I felt, rather than saw the first few virgin rays of the early sun. Strands of golden threads weaved their way through the leaves and branches of the old Golden Showers tree (i don't really know the name of this species of tree - it has flowers that are bright yellow, and they would tumble down in showers when it's time to shed.. and I would picture myself under that waterfall of gold - mummy loves this kind of tree, and I promised her to get her the same tree in her very own garden that would come with her very own house) that I was standing under - to trace their warm tendrils on my cold cheek .

Tell me... ... .how much...
I closed my eyes, and bowed my head in a silent prayer to the One whom I felt had His hand linked with mine throughout entire journey of my life. I told Him that I had found my one true love - William, and I told him that he was far, far away in Australia persuing his degree, I told Him about my new focus in life - to lead a career of a Brand Manager, I told Him about my decision to leave my current job to pursue an entirely new venture in Singapore, I told Him about mummy wanting her divorce and I told Him that i was contented with what I had now.

Abundance.. ... .. and
I thanked Him for teaching me the meaning of true love and adoration by bringing me and William together. I thanked Him for letting us learn about each other and making our first experience being in love such a wonderful fairytale come true - even though we were miles apart. I thanked Him for all the great souls who were my closest friends and family, for their evergreen love, their laughter, their unconditional friendship, for their tears, for their ears, hearts and hugs. I thanked Him for letting me enjoy the simple joys of life, for coloured butterflies, for spring scented morning dew, for the gift of touch to feel my hand in his, for life itself. I thanked Him for giving me the strength to bear burdens that another 22 year old would have never could. I thanked Him for letting me be here.

Hope.. .. .. that you'd want from...
The harmony of the choir softened.... as I prayed for undying love, less worries, more sincere smiles, additional passionberry kisses, more servings of patience, less materialism, more beauty and more sweet memories for everyone and anyone. I prayed that my mummy would not lose anymore sleep over our clouded past - and that soon her worries would come to pass. I prayed that Sharmila, Jessica and Chui Ling (my cousin in Holland now) would pass their exams, and be what they had wanted to be for so long - to be free and happy. I prayed for my daddy's happiness. I prayed for Shaun's future and may it be as fruitful as mine. I prayed for the safety of my love and that he would lead a life that would be perfect in every way possible.

The Lessons.. ...
I begged for forgiveness from Him, for not being able to truly feel and understand the hurt and pain that mummy has gone through with her marriage of 24 years - I really am trying to make her look into the future, and not dwell on the past. I told Him I was sorry for not being able to be there for anyone who had needed me most for comfort - I myself had needed someone for comfort. I am sorry for sometimes demanding a little too much from the people around me, and making them dissappointed with themselves for not being up to my standards. I am sorry I might be insensitive to the negatives of life - and not being able to relate to one's pain, because I never find it useful to feel pain and regret and sorrow, because He had given us this one life, only one, to enjoy to the fullest, and that is what I intend to do. Live life like you have never lived before.

A light breeze had carried the scent of fresh flowers.. lifting my newly trimmed fringe.. ... ..

That had shaped.... you?
... ... Sighing deeply, I glanced at my mummy to my right, and blinked back tears - the woman that I want to grow up to become, so weak, so tired... .. in her golden years of life.... . If only she knew how much I had cried for her when she was in pain, jolted from the agony of going through years and years of being so unloved by my daddy, rocking myself to sleep, trying to comfort myself that she would be all right, during those rough years waay back ago. If only she knew that behind my stern and harsh words of sarcasm towards her expressions of still alighted love for my daddy and hopes of getting back the family, were just thick protective walls to hide my true hurt, my true self, my true wishes.. for the perfect family.. deep inside the scarred me.

Mummy. I just want you to know that, I am strong today, because a long time ago, I became your strength as you became weak - I became our strength. And that strength has helped us - me, you and Shaun - so much, and through the years, we managed, you managed to gain your strength and confidence to fight it till the end and I will not allow it to waiver. I shall continue to be your strength even though you want to give up. I shall not admit defeat, my dearest mummy. For we have battled in the worst wars, and this is just another skirmish. I will not cry in front of you because I am your only source of courage and perseverence.

Mummy. I admire the way you love. And I would want to love the way you are loving us, and my father who had took you for granted - your unconditional love, even up to now I sometimes even wonder why you bothered. I would never want to lead the period of pain and suffering that you had - but i had learn from our mistake, Mummy. And I will never want it to be repeated again because, I would definately crumble, and ended my life, unlike you - you went on. And on.

My Easter, is not only a renewal of faith, and life for the One that risen again - but it's a renewal of my faith, for my family - for my Mother and that her sufferings will not be in vain.

.. . The crowd dispersed... . just like how my prayers were.. into the wind.. evaporating like the morning mist...

But Lord, I felt rejuvenated.

Amen.

*my mentor, my Mother*
~an original p@ssion-@rt

r.@.i.n.y weekends with @pple

Ahh. Finally. At home again, after a tiring weekend.

After that fucked up meeting at work on Wednesday, I gave myself half a day off, as well as Thursday.. and Friday too (.... why not!..Duh.... they wouldn't realise that I am gone.. ... all I do is take pictures of china made crap the entire day... . ) . So I had a wonderful weekend just calming myself down, and telling myself that obtaining an atom bomb to nuke the office was kinda expensive. So I just decided to spend some time at home, recuperating, chatting to my William.

On Friday, my aunts from Singapore decided to come down and make my weekend busy. They are my most favourite aunts from my daddy's side of the family. They come down occasionally to hang out, shopping, do their manicure and pedicure.. and just to peek and see if their niece is still alive in her pile of mess. They are quite concerned about my job, and the younger aunt (li-jiun) has found a job opening for me as an IT assistant at her company in Singapore. Hermes. (http://www.hermes.com). She's the Administration Manager and she had worked there for 20 years now.

Now, for those who does not know Hermes, it is a luxury brand from Paris. Something like Louis Vuitton and DKNY. All I know that Hermes sells handbags and scarfs and horse riding .. stuff. One bangle from Hermes would cost approximately enough to buy an entire set of ... ... 24k gold.. dentures. (... .. .. maybe some old toothless billionaire had nothing else to do but to chomp with his wealth... ). And I have a watch from Hermes, a beach towel, a bangle, a key pendant and a plate... some.. where.. All courtesy from my dearest aunt. Her room, is filled with orange boxes and brown ribbons. It's a maze in there. She and I compete for the most messiest room award. The first person who needs to get into her room through the window is the winner! (Ohh.. remember I posted up a picture of my office space? Trust me, that mess is peanuts compared to the jungle in my room - looks as if a tsunami bore through it - the contractor of my house, would not even recognise the same room that he had designed and built)

Yes.... Enough of my lynn-made labyrinth of Subang Jaya. Subang Jaya, has been my place of residence for the past.... ... 15 years of my life. i was here since Primary One, Primary Two, then I went down to Malacca for Primary 3 (Methodist Girls School down Jalan Tengquerah - my mum's old school when she was young for her entire primary and secondary education, cool eh??? ), came back to Subang Jaya for Primary 4, 5 and 6. I was at the Sri Aman Secondary Girls school for my 5 years of high school in Petaling Jaya. I was in Sunway College for 2 years before I went to Queensland, Australia to further my studies in IT. I graduated in year 2003.

.. ... ... .. Ok. Enough of my boring history. Why did i tell you guys that load of grandmother story... ... ... ... Oh.... Yes. I wanted to tell you about Sunway Pyramid. Sunway Pyramid was 'THE' place-to-hangout-to-show-off-lame-gfs and also the place for 'kutu lepak' (kutu lepak - loitering.. lice?.. ) when I was still young, and innocent, and goody goody, and 'fresh'.. and 'green'... .. .. Yaar. I WAS a good girl. Hang on... .. I AM still a good girl..

(... pfftttttttt... yar rite.. stop lying to yourself... you can lie in this blog but not to yourself. )

... ....* I swear I'll kick you in the nuts... THREE TIMES for extra measure.*
.. ... ... .. .... I am a Good girl.. .

... *ahem*

Yessss... so. When I was... .. young, Pyramid was the place. And it's still the place that i like to hang out, just to browse... to play bowling.. (yarr.. and to break my finger nail).. to ice skate.. (and to be helped by this oh so cute guy with a ponytail and a baby face and a nice, firm.. .. ... ... bummm.. no... er.. i mean grip).

.. .. and to have a midnight stroll with your-boyfriend-to-be.

... It was the night of 17th January. 2 days after mummy's birthday. Carol and Freon were sleeping like bloated hogs on the two single beds in the Sunway Hotel room. They had worked hard for the Malaysia-India Conference that I was working part time to ease their burden of the ticketing department. There was another day of conference on the 18th and Freon suggested that I stayed over in the hotel instead of going home. And I wouldn't have agreed to it if it weren't for..

William.

It was akward for him. Being in a hotel room with 3 other girls. Alone (.. and being an innocent guy like him.. .. ... .. *blinks... thinks*... .. double PPFFTT!!! to that!!). He was staying back too. And it was during dinner that I was still contemplating on whether or not to stay for the night. I was mentally tired when we were having dinner together at a vegetarian dinner at Pyramid - tired of trying to reason out things with my boss, my job, my position in the company. Tired of always having to put up my 'force field' around my vulnerable self when dealing with the rough, real world. Tired of having to put up a brave, professional front when your inner self is screaming for release, for being someone that everyone expects you to be. And I had been around with a lot of people for that day. I couldn't eat. And I was irritated because my eyes still kept drifting to him. And I didn't feel very comfortable with Freon around. I wasn't exactly her best fan. I didn't like her style of work. And I definately felt that I could have done a much better job at organising and managing her department although I was 6 years her junior.

My mind wasn't following the conversation at the table. I don't remember what was the topic. But Bernard (Freon's colleague) was also adding to my edginess. He was treating me like a small little girl the entire day. Making me eat food that I didn't like. And who is he to treat me like a baby anyway?... I don't let anyone or everyone do that... It's just not.. right. And then, Sky called me and said that he was at Pyramid. Good. A good excuse to leave the dinner (i was just eating whatever was nearest to my chopstick anyway) and to go talk to Sky about the shitty situation at my workplace.

Actually. I didn't want to talk to Sky. I didn't want to talk to Carol, Freon or anyone. I just wanted to have my space. Time alone.. Time out. I took a long walk to Kim Gary where Sky was, spent a few minutes cursing the company, then I walked to the hotel where my car was parked. The night was very lively for a weekday. Maybe the delegates from the conference had found some fresh playmates - ahh the wonders of an Asian country... so many chicks.. so little time..

I was somewhat calm as I walked the dark path, and I focused my mind back on whether or not to stay on for the night. I couldn't find a solid ground to base my decision on. I was tired - but there was a bed in the room, and in my room at home. There was air con in the hotel room at least - but.. so what if I had no air con in my house, i'd sleep if there was a tsunami beneath me (not before I have checked that I had a reinforced floor and ceiling and roof). All were stupid reasons. And as I was just taking out my car key, and pressing the button for the lift to the carpark- Oh.. William. He's staying back too, isn't he?

I headed for the hotel room after confirming that they would (.. actually.. more on 'he would') be at the room. Carol and Freon were already snoring their praises to Father Time. And he, well, he was just ... there. He looked tired and exhausted. Freon was sprawled across the bed - well, no chance of him sharing the bed with her (he might be scared of getting raped... or something.. didn't want to scare the guts out of the poor fella). Carol was... just .. well, I was supposed to share the bed with her - but my mind was too worked up to actually catch any Z's. And.. it was only... 9pm.. or something. I glanced at him - the poor boy looked so .. helpless... .. ... ...

.. ... and innocent... and attractive.. and he has this sincere smile which I had caught him flashing it once or twice.... which he did quite rarely... . and ... .. why am I thinking of this .. of William?... .. great.. another item to move forward on my to-do list - this guy is taking up very much of my thinking space - not only I had been eyeing him the entire day when he was working alongside with me, being so ... professional and nimble with his words, his attentiveness, his arrogance made me feel so.. weak... *blinks*.. DEFINATELY need a lot of thought on this mysterious person. .. no guy makes Lynn vulnerable. Never. N.e.v.e.r.

Okay girl - solve one problem at a time. ..
Operation William-the-interesting-baby-face-guy starts in 5....4.... 3.... 2...


L : William, wanna go for a ride? or would you rather ... *glances at Freon, hoping that she is still hogging the entire bed... ... good.. she's still being a big obstacle* .. .. err.. try to get some sleep?

W : Hmmm?.. Sure.. ... I'm up for it.

*.. ooohhh...he answered a little too.. quickly.... hhhmm.... interesting*
L : You sure? You seem tired. You can urm... squeeze up with Freon a little bit.. *.. ppfftt... see if you can, mummy's boy*... I just want to get my clothes from home. I live pretty close. It's just a short ride.
*yeah.. at least there'd be someone to divert my attention away from the other crappy work related shit in my mind*

W : Yea.. I'm pretty sure. It's too early to sleep anyway!

L : ... ... ... Ah.. Okay *yay!*


Tried to keep my eyes on the road. A quick glance showed that he was deep in thought - or maybe he was just tired - or he was trying to make sure that he would come out from my car, alive with no bones broken - or... I might just be thinking too much. I thought I could hear the faint grinding - click - click - click sounds of gears shifting in his mind. (that I had intention of peeking into.. just a little peek... you never know what surprises that you might find in a good, innocent, quiet boy's mind... .. ) He was quiet, and the other problems at work started to cloud my mind again. I didn't realise that I had reached the gates of my house. My doggies were rather energetic. I had to skip around their tails and paws to get to the front door without making a fool out of myself. I wonder if he liked dogs..I knew he has dogs... .. Hmmmm mmm ..

And the mystery guy of my thoughts was happy to stay in the car. That was the first time I had drove a guy, in my car, to my house. That was the first time William had a glance at my home. It is not grand at all - my home. Just a place where I go home to sleep after my work. Home was not an appropriate term, I guess. Home was what I lost when my parents had their seperation in 2000. And a Home of my own to settle down and live happilly ever after was on my to-do list in the near future. Oh, we have reached the hotel room? That was darn quick. Yarrr.. blame the innocent, quiet, delicious... .. guy.

L : So, no extra pillows ar?
*i didnt feel like yanking out the pillow from Carol's thighs... .. maybe he would do it for me... .. .. ... Narrrrrr..... *

W : No loor. We can get some from housekeeping.

L : ... .. Ummm... Sure. I might go for a walk later.
*just please don't fall asleep... . the night is still young.. and I am still so very messed up in my mind.. *

W : Sure. Coming?


(some time later, after we have acquired pillows... and stealing more glances at him... .. hmm... why oh why...... ?)


*okay... this is really messing up my thoughts... i need to sort either one of them out... cute guy-that-my-eyes-have-magneted-to seemed to be very exhausted.. all of us had an early morning.. I shall.. put Operation Mind-boggling-guy on hold till tomorrow... *
L : Um... I'm... going out for a walk.. I just.. want to clear my mind.

W : Okay. Sure. Where to?

*huh.... that was a quick answer.....Why.. does he want to know. He wants to follow me?... Isn't he tired... poor guy.. he has to be.. Who would want to follow me ? In the middle of the night? .. .. hmm... hang on. .. his eyes... ... he's trying to read me.... or.. something... I have been trying to avert my gaze away from him.. he might.. just suspect.. that I am onto him.. Or.. am I??*

L : Um.. I'm just... out.. walking.. ...
*shrugs - alone.. supposedly.. but.. .. i do.. want you to come... ... wha..?.. Lynn?... you ok ar?*

... .. Do you.. have anywhere to go?.. Someplace in mind?

W : *shrugs*.. Anywhere would be fine with me.

L : Oh... Oh.. kay..


I brought him to meet Patricia at Starbucks. Just to say hi... *and show her whom I had tagging along.... he's quite a prized accessory... * Sure enough, she was waiting for her 'hubby' to get off work. Hmm... she .. looks.. so much.. bigger. Is she pregnant again?.. *sighs*.. I had always looked down on girls who gets themselves into trouble - and then abort their unborn children as if nothing had happen. Barbarians..


P : Yo Lynn. New boyfriend?????

*raised eyebrows... I cast a worried glance at him... uh-oh.. I forgot about my reputation with guys.. hope he doesn't freak out.. being known as my bf might not be the best of identities - i'm not that lucky.. ... . he seems pretty comfy lounging in that arm chair... gawd why does he still look so sophisticated and heart stopping even though he's deprived of sleep?... maybe it's the shirt.. or that hidden smile... or .... the way he crosses his legs.. or.. or... .. *

L : William???... *gulps*... Narrr.. he's just a friend... Lynn.. having a boyfriend???? Narrrrr.... Ummm... let's go...
*before she starts teasing us.. and then I'll feel bad for humiliating him... and I'll never forgive myself*


Well, Red Chamber was a rather romantic place to hang out. With it's red clothed ceiling etched with subtle hints of Arabic inspiration. The dimmed, mellow lights made the ambience glow with a deep, scarlet red - with gold fringed throw pillows littered around cosy sofas. He ordered his usual bottle of mineral water... He can't drink - (found that out on Carol's birthday - nearly ruined my shoes...) . And I had my usual cocktail. Apple .. vodka.. or something.

The previous time we were here, was with Yee Peng(a common friend), I think - after a session of karaoke. And somehow, we got around to the topic on whether he was still single or not and whether he has had any previous relationship. He had answered no to both questions. And I had kept that information into one of the many unsorted drawers in my massive mess of a mind - never did I know I would dig out that information again. And we had even talked about his preferences of a girlfriend. And at this point, I did not realise that I was all ears until I actually blushed.. at one point of the conversation. I half expected him to drawl on with the normal kinda characteristics of an Ah Lian - brainless, more boobs than sense, fuckable face, whiny, bitch.. However, to my silent delight, it went something like this...


W : ... ... ... .. I prefer a lady who is smart, independant and she must have a matured thinking..

YP : Hmm.. Lynn is like that what.

W : *nods gravely* Ummm.. Yes.. I know Lynn is.

... ... .. I had no idea why my heart actually missed a beat.


And my heart did its sommersault again when I had braved myself to rest my gaze longer on him a week or so later while clutching a pillow close to my beating heart. The warm silhoutte of the glow from the surrounding lamps cast him a soft, rich, golden tone on his pale skin. Already lining the faint hints of dark circles beneath his deep gaze. I longed to reach out my fingers to push back a stray part of his fringe that keeps getting into his eyes - but there were just some risks that I do not take. I liked being in his company and I liked his silent thoughts - they broke the silence of words. I felt his mind - i just didn't quite make out what was his thoughts dwelling on. I knew 'sleep' was on his mind, but i was raptured by his voice, his calmness, trying to talk me into being patient with my fucked up boss. But.. it really didn't matter that much - all that mattered was he was close by.

As I curled up next to Carol, and the poor dear boy was on the floor, near the lamp - I was still reflecting on the day.. on the evening. I replayed little things in my mind.. the way he shook hands, the way he pushed that stubborn strand of hair, the way he neatly folded his hands on his knee, how soothing his voice was.. .. ... .. and I closed my eyes... the last vision of him .. sleeping close by... faded to black. And somewhere deep in my mind and heart, I couldn't wait for tomorrow. .. .. .. ..

~Present~
2:15am.. Easter Sunday. Sunrise service at 6:45am. Leaving at 6:30am. ..
I should sleep. And I'm missing him again. *sighs*

e.@.t this

* eat this! *
~an original p@ssion-@rt

I just love the things that goes round the web. Beeaauuutifull stuff... that i love to share with all of you. ;)

@.d.d.i.c.t.i.o.n is good for he@lth

Yesterday started out as a bad morning. I had to cough up phlegm so that i could breathe properly and not gasp for air like some.. ... lung-less.... zombie.... Anyway, thanks to kinky thoughts about loverboy the night before and a bad throat couple that up with a fantasic wave of coughing fits thoughout the night left me with... zero energy and zero sleep. So much for kinky thoughts. So, need to get better to .. get better.. kinky thoughts (why... am i thinking of kinky thoughts?).. i must be obedient, listen to william (and .. the doctor too... hmm.... Dr. William...?... ... ) and be a good girl and take my medicine. However....

Problem #1
Lousy, retarded bottling of government medicine
Cap is too loose. Victim (... I.. of course.. ) had placed unsafe-for-children plastic bottle in same plastic bag as other pill medication - on it's side. Cough mixture was..... seeping into the other stuff.. making them all taste like cough syrup. (hope they do not melt.... i hope). Everything stuck together. Had to dig pills out from sticky mess... (hmmm... sticckkkyyy.... *blinks*.... lynnnnnn.. stop it ) with nicely manicured nails. Flu medicine tasted like... photostat machine powder toner and uhu glue.

And so... to not make matters worst by being late at the office (for the millionth time.. ), I decided to leave 10 minutes earlier than usual. That was at... 7.55am. ... ... ...


Problem #2
.. Less than 500 kms later... and time was 8:30am.

... ... ... .. so much for leaving earlier. I could park my car in the middle of this traffic jam and i would have just reached home on foot and might even catch a few minutes of snooze. I could throw a stinkbomb from where i was into the park at the front of my house... and still smell the stink. 35 mins in a bloody jam caused by an incompetant traffic police who stops traffic at every possible minute so that he could give his waving hand a rest. Fine. Let retarded dumbos have their way. I'll be late for work. What difference would it make anyway??? A million and one?

9:00am. Reached the office. And there has been this.. stench.... of.. rotting.... crap (yes.. i mean 'shit') that has been hanging around the factory area for a few weeks and it's still around. It might be somebody rotting alone in the vacant mosquito breeding area just over the fence, or it is just... Gina's aura. I really really hope it's the former - at least it would bring some paparazzi and some excitement of mystery. The latter, would only bring more bullshit, and the stench would rot you from the inside out.

I then fought my way through the stinky war and reached the punch card machine. Then a problem walked in.


Problem #3
Stanley. He was a good friend of Patricia (whom in turn... I have decided to ditch the girl as a friend... long story.. let's just say she was not up to my standards of ... .. my standards). We were friends, and then as a favour, I recommended him for the IT person for the company, and things started rolling downhill in terms of our friendship. Never, Ever work with a friend, no matter how much you know that person... no matter whether that person knows that you wear grandmother undies or your grandmother wears your undies and that person wants to bribe you for the job to keep your undie sharing activities a secret... ...... .... where am I going... Ah yes. Do not work with a friend. It is shitty. And seeing that person everyday and knowing that you are much more senior than him is very not nice and that there used to be a good friendship in place of competitiveness in the workplace. But.. it's just a minor problem. Just wanted to hike up the problem count.


Finally sat down at my lime green chair... the only item of Axxezz that I would miss when I leave the company in 16 days... ahh... That's a good thought...

Switched on the computer.. ahh.. picture of loverboy and me on desktop wallpaper.. That's an even better thought. I miss him so so so dearly. Hope he is not feeling as crappy as I am. Already I am sniffling and snorting like Uma (my operations manager, who is 35 years old, who has overflowing boobs, who has just graduated with a law degree, and now working here because no one in the right frame of mind would hire an old freshie lawyer) on one of her normal days when she's trumpeting her nose off with a variety of snorts and ... whatever elephants do with their trunks. So, i get comfy on the chair, nibbling at my chicken floss bun, taking my own sweet time, and as if by cue, William comes online .. and I fall in love all over again. We.. are definately Made (Meant?) For Each Other. (go listen to Kavana - MFEO).

As I was just going into lovvy dovvy mode.... I saw the bastard's car driving into the compound.. contaminating everything.... .melting.. into vile waste. ... .. Shit... It's Wednesday.


Problem #4
Wednesdays = meeting where all the shop supervisors and office staff sits down at a round table, with the boss at the head of the table, for an extremely useless agenda, from 10am to 12pm, or 1pm, or 2pm.. or.. when someone dies of food deficientcy or when the boss herself whinesssss for food like a little piglet.. oink. or when Uma snorts her discomfort. snort. And then there would be a medly of oinkoink snorrrttt.. oink oink snnooorrrrttt... oinkoinnn.. ... .. *blinks*... what's wrong with me???? .. Yessss... and then it would be continued after lunch (which was always Kentucky Fried Chicken. Apparently the mutant piglet likes chicken. and likes it with 2 thighs, and an extra serving of gravy - which i always have to put in the request list before hand - until the snorting Dumbo recommended catering of indian and malay food - to the delight of the other imbeciles) for another 3 hours of more stupid agenda. Basically, it's like a hog feast.


Problem #5
... .. and I have to be in the vicinity of that fucked up bastard. Coincidentally, his sow is stuck at the hospital, for the past week, trying to give birth to another one of the species. Seems that it doesn't want to leave the warm recesses. Smart. I know I wouldn't want to come out into the world if i knew I were to get shit heads as parents. I hope they need to cut her up. Pork waste anyone?...


.. .. awwww... but piggies are cute. maybe i should refer to them as rats. they are totally useless vermins. Feeding off the scraps of humanity. Yessssss.... ooohhhh... the evilness in me.....

Ah yess... so where was I... ....

Ahh... And... guess what was on the agenda today?? You guessed it.. TOILET ROLLS!... Everything evolves around crap in this company. She was expressing her deepest regrets that she might have to cut off the supply of TOILET PAPER if she still finds that the empty TOILET ROLLS are left arranged nicely in a row on the top of the chamber pot. (the most that i saw were around 8) And so, like little good kindergarten kiddies, we promised to never, ever, ever leave the empty TOILET ROLLS in the toilets or we would all be spanked soundly and sent to bed. (to my loverboy's bed, i hope.. ... ... *blinks*.... .... .. what the... .. you know.. all this stress is messing up my hormones.)

Yes.. half an hour into the meeting, another problem found its way into my mind.


Problem #6
I miss William. I really do. Even sms-ing him directly opposite Snorter did not help.


And then came my turn to dish out my own doshings of crap. But mind you, my crap was much more fragrant than the rest because I get straight to the point. First one on my list was Annual Dinner. It will be on the 11th of April 2005 (yess.. this year..... and not the next...... but at the rate of all the crap they kick around, it might never happen) . And fifteen minutes into the topic, talking about useless excrement about how grand and fine the other dinners were - hheeellloooo....... can't they just focus on the present???? no wonder all of them are blooody outdated. their brains were left behind in the past! - Uma the Snorting Snorter, piped up casually all of a sudden to no particular person. " Oh.. we can't have the dinner on the 11th, though. It would be the first day after the renovations and everything would have to be put back into order."

.. ... .................. I was nearly foaming at the mouth.


Problem #7
My nose was runny and i think foaming at the mouth would be a messy sight. it would also ruin my nice shirt too. So i ditched the idea of foaming at the mouth.


Problem #8
I had PATIENTLY allowed the change of dates for the past 3 times. It was supposed to be 9th of March. BUT the inconsiderate supervisors of the shops, said that. "Ohh... but it's too rush.. it's in the beginning of our sales period"... Well, yeaah.. i know that you guys would be busy but you weren't fucking hell complaining when all of you agreed to the date in the first place!.. !!!!

So fine. They said March 15th would be good. because everything would be settled as in the rush of early sale bargains would be over and gina says its just perfect. So fine. I called up all the hotels again, even Passion in KL, Shangrila at Putrajaya and the Hiton at KL. I had to apologize profusely. And told them that the change would be final.

Then.. ... .. .... a week before the dinner..


Problem #9
"Ohh... but it's too rush.. it's in the middle of our sales period".. says muthafaka
(from outlet godknowswho&hebetterkeepassecretorIwillpersonallynukethemuthafaka)

... .... .... .... ... .... ..... .... ... ... . .. ... .... ... HOPE ALL OF YOU ROT IN HELL AND THE DEVIL WOULD MAKE YOU HIS STABBING PILLOW...OR TARGET OR WHATEVER HE USES TO RELEASE HIS ANGER ON WHEN HIS MINIONS TELLS HIM TO POSTPONE THE ANNUAL HELLFEAST FOR THE 2ND TIME!!!!. ...

.. .. .. ... . .. ... *fumes.. *.... ...

Problem #10
Okay. So i called up all the hotels again (leaving out Shangrila and Hilton and Prince hotel and... basically the entire list). Telling them that tha date has been postponed to after sales. And that would be on April 11th, Monday - so that it would not clash with the heavy traffic on weekends and there's a week to settle whatever shit that messes up after the sales. Big boss say anything also can, and her Snortbuddy said it was fine. And she said that the supervisors would be fine with it. So fine. I thought end of story.

But NNNnnnnnNNnNnnnNnnnNOOoooOoOoOooOoo....

" Oh.. we can't have the dinner on the 11th, though. It would be the first day after the renovations and everything would have to be put back into order."

Shut up you BBBIIAAAATTTCCCHHH.... WHY TELL ME NOW???? WHY NOT TELL ME A DAY BEFORE THE *(^%^$%$ DINNERRRR???????

.. ... ... .. ... ... .. ... .. ... .. .. and I thought. Oh-kkkaaay.... not too bad.. my list is now left with one only.. that's Hyatt Sheraton... ... not tooo badd... and the guy handling the event has a nice.. sexy.. husky.. voice.... BUT


Problem #11
G : ... ... ... ... "Oh Lynn, you had better think of the games you know!!... You know ar... last time we had the newspaper dance horrr..... .. "

L : ... .. *"YYEESsssssssssssss... Ms Giinnnaaa... it's all in the proposal that i submitted 3 months ago... Have you READ it yet????"*

G : "Oh yessssss I have!..... And you know arrr... we had this dress up the person with newspaper thinggggg u knowwww... !... "

L : ... ... ... *"YYeesSsSsSSSssSsSsssssss Mssssss Ginaaa... you would even know how to play the K%C@&F(&U*^ game properly if you would actually READ what I had proposed"*....
*before you open that trap of yours*

G : "Oh yess.. and you know arr.. we could have.... "

I didn't want to listen to anymore of her farts. So I said..

L : *"YYYeesss Ms Gina... April the 13th 2005 it would be then... .... ANY OBJECTIONS??"*
*Or so help me god I swear I will kill myself and my ghost would haunt the shit out of all of you till the day you DIE.*

... ... ... ... - blank stares -.. ... ...

L : *"Good. All agree. "*


... ... ... ... ... ... and no. That was not the last of the problems.


Problem #12
Next issue - Promotions

Evon (supervisor KLCC) : I would like to clarify about this Hong Leong Bank Promotions. Buy RM100 with your credit card and get Rm10 voucher. Is this valid for sales period?

L : Yes Evon.
(i had already clarified with her over the phone a week ago saying that in the contract is it not stated that the promotion is not valid for sales period. But the voucher can only be used on non-sales period... BUT Why.. can't she just ACCEPT the explaination from the Advertising and Promo Manager? Don't have to be the smarty pants you know... i think you are just one step behind me without even trying to actually be smart compared to the dull witted morons in the same room!!)

G : Huh??? No Lynn. It is not applicable for sales period!.. Where's the contract of the promotion??

L : Here. *flips out the contract at the first page from thin air* It clearly does not state the terms and conditions that I had given them. But I have run this past Uma and she said that it was already understood.

G : Huh..?? Reallly?.... I haven't seen this document before in my entire life!.. I don't think I would have agreed with the promotion mechanics in the first place!

L : *dramatically flips to the second page with her clear signature*. Are you sure? Then whose signature is this? Uma's? It's definately not mine. Mine reads 'Lynn' and not 'GinaFH'
*gotcha FAIRY GOD MOTHA FUCKA!!*

G : Huh??... Oh. But next time make sure i go through every single contract before you send it out.

.. ... .. *Yar... and what the hell was I doing all this while??? Fanning your FAT ARSE with the damn contract while you take a pen and sign it while using MY CUTE BUM for support?????*

THINK WOMAN... USE THOSE BRAINS... GOD PUT THEM THERE FOR A REASON, NOT FOR DECORATION PURPOSES. DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S A BRAIN? IT'S LOCATED IN THE AREA BETWEEN YOUR EARS AND NO GODDAMMIT ..... IT'S NOT YOUR FACE!

.. ... ... ahh that feels much better... NeXt!


Problem #13 - 15#
L : I propose that we have the fashion workshops at KLCC every Friday for the month of April. What do you think?

U : Hmm. Yes. I think it's good. And it would be the weekend. It would be great.

L : So it's confirmed then.
*I shall write it down now on the ONLY registration form that we have for the Management of KLCC in this itsy bitsy space they have allotted with my trusty old Office Issued Axxezz Lime Green Pen (which only costs .05 cents cause the boss had them made in bulk in China - we have enough to provide to at least 10 generations of accountants and copywriters in the entire world from their kindergarten age till they pass on to the next world. that's lots of writing.) and then I have to fax this copy nice and clean and neat.*

G : Yes. That's Good. That's a good idea. Definate crowd.! And we can do this and you know ar...
... ... ...

.. .. ... after half an hour of her fictitious ideas and bullcrap with everyone listening to her intently... all being very supportive and totally HAPPY with the dates of the workshops.. and then...

G : You know. Let's have it on saturdays. So the families and come together to out shop for family day... !!!!

L : ... ..... ... ... wha... ?... *breathes deeply... fine*
*draws neat line on the words Friday along with the dates.... ..... ..... ...... ... waitammminute *

L :.. ... ... Everyone confirmed? Are you okay with it EVONnnnnNnn? Umma?

Evon & U : *shrugs*.. Ok..

L : .. .. ... *i see a shrug.. *.. Nevermind. just get it over and done with.
*writes new dates and days into the ever reducing itsy bitsy space*

G : And you know?... the designers can go around the shops and make sure all the shops are doing the same event you know??? it will be more fun and exciting!!..

L : *raises eyebrows*.. And... ... The 2 designers are... ... going to seperate themselvessss.. into 4... for all the shops that we have?.. We already have not enough man power.
Hmm.... Evon, what do you think? Is your side clear for manpower?

*well you agreed on the damn dates, you should have enough manpower rite??? but have to keep.. professssionalll.. *

Evon : Hmm.. Actually. There will be too many customers to actually have anything else to do with workshops on Saturdays. Let's have it on Tuesdays.

L : ... ... .. ... .. ... ... .. ... .. ... *hand trembling with control*.. Steadyyy now girl...

U : Hmm... Maybe Monday....

L : ... .. ... ... .. lllll...ooo...s..iin.gg.... controll....

Evon : Mondays la. I think better.. Have it at 3 - 5 pm.

G : Hmm.. tell you guys what. Tuesdays, 1 - 3 pm!!!... Good everyone?

Evon & U : *shrugs*.. Ok.

L : ... ... .... ... ... .... ..
*oohhhhhhhhhh....... ttheee ... anngggeerrr ... mmuustt KILL somee thing!!*
* SSCCraaaTTTTcchhHChhchchh ...ScribBBLesSs SccRiBbLLeSsSsSss .. *

.. There.. I hope the management of KLCC understands MANGLISH. (Mangled English caused by excessive stress)



Problem #16
Next issue - Magazines

G : Lynn, we were in Vida! this month. Did you know about it?

L : No
(*because I did not want to buy a bloody magazine with MY money and have to go through all that bloody paperwork just to claim for that ONE magazine*)

G : Why?

(*why can't you read my thoughts, you nimcompoop! it would help lessen the effort of repeating myself!!!!*)
L : Because I did not have the time. I was taking pictures of the new collection. And you wanted to hurry that promotions folder. And you wanted the Axxezz Exposure folder.

.... .. -*and i had rather convert my working time to quality time spent with my dearest love of my life chatting on MSN the entire day, using your internet connection [which I bloody hell set up in the first place!!], using your computer [which I had to fix, modify and upgrade myself because it was fit for an antique museum], and getting paid for it!! DOH!*

G : Yeah but you know lynn, ... ... How about the other magazines last month? Female? Cleo? Does the shops know about it?

L : Well, I did mention it to them over the phone because even though i faxed them the photocopies of the pages, it wouldn't be clear.

G : Then buy more magazines of the same copy la!.... That's better right?

L : *thinks*... Er is that a trick question? Because ...... you said 6 months ago that its better to save cost and just photostat the pictures from the magazine.

G : Huh? No. Did I.. Sky( my designer) !!!... Make sure next month the shops get copies okay ? Make sure ar!.

.. ... WTF??


Fucked up Fact #1
.. .. ... .. .. .. .. .. .. Giving MY responsibilities to MY junior whom I INTERVIEWED, HELPED TRAINED for the past 6 MONTHS and not forgetting the moral support and all the encouragement and strain and stress and sweat that I had given in effort to make a BETTER TEAM?

Fucked up Fact #2
In front of a bloody board meeting you put me down?... And to think that I am the LONGEST STAYING, youngest, highest paid SENIOR executive in your entire company's employment history??? I was your god damnned operations manager cum supervisor cum retail assistant cum PR exec cum receptionist when all your pathetic team of ex supervisors left you to DIE!!!!. I admire them for their bravery in stealing all that money and stocks which I HAD NEVER THOUGHT OF EVEN THOUGH I HOLD ALL THE MAIN KEYS TO ALL THE SHOPS.

Fucked up Fact #3
I was your ONLY web designer, visual merchandiser (goddammit, i drove all the way to penang ALONE - and your current designers REFUSES to go anywhere without a plane ticket - and back just to put TWIGS in the bloody window), IT person and A&P person - FUCK BITCH I created the god damned A&P Department for you!!! - and you are giving the RESPONSIBILITY that i CREATED to MY JUNIOR who has never ever been through the entire year of lame shit of an excuse of what you define as PROFESSIONAL MANAGEMENT?

... .. That's it. That was just enough of fuckin' bullshit for half a day. It was only 12:30pm.

I turned to Gina.

L : That is all I have to say. May I be excused for the rest of the day as I am very sick.

G : Huh? What's wrong with you? What sick?

L : ... .. ... ... ... ... ... I have sore throat, cough, fever, flu and a migraine ... Bye. (assholes!)
(yes.. a migraine bigger and much more important than a crock full of your-china-made-stuff = shit)


Yes. Left that Mad as Hell house/playpen of hers. Reached home in record timing.

Had a gooood... loonggg shower.... put on my favourite white spagetti strap and matching undies. Curled up in front of my monitor with my comfiest pillow. Signed into MSN.

SOLUTION #1 to everything and anything

L : *hugggsssssssss*...... .. I missed you so much. I really do..

W : *muahssss*.. Miu miu?... I miss you tooooo.

...... .... ... ... .... ...

.. ... ... It was amazing. The mere presence of him.. his words, his attention, his.. sincerity, his pure love for me... Everything... the entire 4 hours of HELL i went through. Everything just... vanished. Absolutely vanished.. No trace at all. All i wanted to do when I was stuck in the dreaded meeting of fucked up crap... was to see my love... The only thing that mattered was that he was with me. And I love him so much for being there, even though he didn't know my office was a place worst than Hell - even though I was worrying over some psychotic nutcase of a boss, being the lowest of moods - I felt so loved.

I am so addicted. Just so much.

winner of d.i.r.t.i.e.s.t contest

*dirtiest pose everrr..!!!*
~an original p@ssion-@rt

Yes, yes. Since no one could think of a dirtier idea than I, I proudly present the award for having the dirtiest mind ever to.. .. me, myself and I!!!!!

... .. *.. ... that's.. .. a dirty pose?.. *

.... ... what? it's a dirty pose what.. .. at least 50% of the picture is taken up by an internationally reknowned sign for vulgarity... !!...

(a few blogs ago recap)....
.....
I will send a picture of me (me, myself and I) in the dirtiest pose EVER... for the person who leaves the DiRTiEST.. EViLEST.... (full stop, julea.. full STOP..) chat ever in the Comments page. (if there are no contenders, I WILL WIN THE EVER OH SO GRE.... oh... just a picture of me ar?.. ah well)
.....

*...pfftt... oh yiippeeeeee*

... . *shhhussshhhh up you. at least i won something. nye nye nye .....nyeeee nye.*

p.a.m.p.e.r.e.d like a princess

*manicured and pampered.. with that silver band*
~an original p@ssion-@rt

*sighs*.. Finally. End of another Monday. Another week closer to meet my darling. And I finally had my manicure and pedicure... last Saturday before the Rave thingamajig. And I am finally confirmed super sick. Runny nose, sore throat, fever, cough... the works. And I finally (.. finally!) dragged my ass to the doctor to get an MC.

And now William's sick too. I am worried for him, but... being worried a gadzillion miles away from him isn't going to help fix anything. I just do hope that he would ... take care of himself. I bet he is going to look like a refugee camp survivor - with a severe case of anorexia - very soon.

Like the nails? My manicurist just loves to try her different designs on my nails. She said my nails were long, nice and they are not brittle at all - in fact, my nails don't break or chip, instead, they would come off entirely if I happen to have knocked it somewhere or got caught somewhere. And she laughed when she saw my little baby small toe - cause i had kicked a chair and the entire nail came off. And now it has no nail on it. But she painted .. the toe anyway.

I love pampering myself because.. i feel that I deserve every single ounce of pampering there is. I am worth it. Well, not that I am trying to blow my horn here, it's just that I am a good girl. Since young, I earned my pamperings and attention by being the best in my class and all that. It's like you have to acheive some sort of high-ness before you get rewarded. Well, now.... I am not young anymore, and my parents and extended family don't pamper me any more. So, it's only up to myself... .. .. and maybe up to my current boyfriend. But it's not all materialism and wealth and all that 'ah lian' shit (eg. Ohhhhh.... my boyfriend has this new car, you know.. and he's going to take me for a ride down bintang walk.. [yeah.. to show off that he has a smarter, brighter and prettier car than the looks of his girlfriend]), i guess it's the attention and fussing about.

But is that it?.. I still can't find the answer to my thoughts. I had been thinking of it since 2 hours ago when I was chatting with him over MSN. I was accusing him of being a sissy and a scaredy-cat when he said he doesn't want to tell his friends about our relationship because he is afraid of being teased - he said he can't stand their teasings. Hmm... well, I understand his reasoning but there is still this... little nagging thingy at the edge of my mind. There's one thing i know and that is i am extremely proud of our new found relationship and the first people to know it were my best friends, Jessica and Sharmila.

And they teased me, yes a little. But they were extremely supportive and they like him. And the news doesn't stop there.. practically everyone in my circle knows that I am no longer available. Well, I was in a way... happy of being teased. At least I was being teased for having someone to love and not getting teased for not having someone to love. Heck, if it were possible, i would even fax a memo to all my colleagues announcing my resignation from the single life. I would want everyone and anyone to know. .. .. But.. why oh confused mind of mine?... Why do I want everyone to know? Why did i call william a sissy (and sissy means.. a guy with no ... guts.. [let's keep it clean.. hehe.. muahs wubby]) when he hinted that he'd rather not let his best friend know about us?

Is it because to keep those nosy stalkers at bay? Is it to prove that someone actually loves me for who I am? Is it to squash all those rumours about me being a playgirl and having a go at any guy with a cute ass? (mind you, william's bum does not meet my mum's standard defination of a cute ass... she says he's 'flat' but she has seen a lot more asses than I have.. being a Singapore Airlines Crew herself for 10 years... she would have had enough asses to last her a lifetime of sweet dreams.. )... Everyone.. mind you, everyone did not expect me to get a bf that could understand my level of maturity and views. They predicted that I might just marry an ill rich old guy, give him a heart attack by doing a strip dance on the first night (make sure he signs his will to pass on all his assets to me before we actually do the naughty dancing), attend his funeral and get all his dough. Yes. I have evil friends. But they do have a point. I have not met anyone that could.. and would.. (so far... william has been.. going fine with my nonsense... i'm expecting him to blow anytime soon though.. ) put up with my demands and needs. And I guess, that makes him a winner.

It's pretty strange.. nowadays, when a might-be-suitor comes up to me.. and usually their 3rd or 4th question of introduction would be "So.. are you in a relationship.. orrr... (is there a tiny little chance that you might even look at me as an equal?)". And I would say that I am in love and planning to stay that way with William for a very long time. And I could actually feel the instant disappointment radiating from the poor guy. And it's a pity because the only guys that could actually get far enough with me to ask that relationship question thingy are the few of the many guys that I could actually have a decent and enlightening conversation with.. with a little spark of interest.

Those days, I'd say "Nope. I'm single and lovin' it. Not really looking but not really not looking either". But no. I'm glad to say that I have been promoted in life and that I am proud of that promotion. And that is why I am always happy to announce that I am with William because he is ... well.. I guess he would be near perfect because I admit I am like a princess.. wanting only the best. And it amuses me when my friends comment that William must be some super duper intellectual hunk that just stepped out from a Play Girl magazine because they are familiar with my high standards.. But.. no.. William is not that. William. .. is the one. My one. And I love him for who he is.

I guess my point.. from all this.. winded up words, messed up thoughts... and I am not even sure if I made any sense at all in this posting... I just needed to... think.. and writing clears my thoughts.

Be proud to love, and to be loved, because you are worth it.
Every kiss, every touch, every whisper, every tear... is yours.. and no one elses.
Your lover is yours, to cradle, to pamper, to cherish, to worship.
Be worthy of love and a life of pure love, is worth living.

b.l.e.s.s.i.n.g.s come in pairs

I woke up this morning to the happy sms-tone of my trusty (and very much battered. I had dropped it on the road and when i wanted to pick it up, my cute blue slippers from Billabong gave it a little kick .. .. 1 meter away... helloooo new scratch on screen!) handphone. And although I was still recovering from last night, I was elated - it was from my loverboy.. So with one eye still trying to catch up on some shut eye session, I happilly sms-ed him back.

The thing that made me ponder about was, I welcomed his interruption of my beauty sleep - maybe it is to the point where I want him to interrupt because... it is the memory of him that I thrive on everyday. If it had been anyone else, even Mummy, I would have snapped back instantly, telling them to leave me alone and to remind them that waking up Lynn when she has not slept enough, would awaken the wrath of Lynn too. And it's not a very pretty sight. (actually, i have only unleashed my wrath on one person - and that's that bastard supervisor and his stupid, cotton-brained sales assistants - the dumbest one of the lot whom I fired because she had this magnet implanted into her fat ass that would magnetize her to the chair the entire day and she wouldn't even lift a toe to do anything - i doubt that she would even lift that very toe to press a button to release more oxigen into the air to continue the survival of all mankind on earth - yes, this blubbering bimbo then became the pig's wife to pollute the earth with more unwanted species).

Well, but after that, thankfully, he left me alone for a while to feed his sow. And because of some untrue stories circulating around the company about him and I having some sort of 'hanky-panky' (hah... some people just take in any shit that is stuffed into them), my boss decided not to let me go around for my regular spot checks on the stores. That's good, so that I can save on the measly transport allowance that she claims that it was so much more than enough.. *pfft*... (yeah.. to power a lawn mower maybe... .. or a bullock cart). I have to say that I am a very tolerant person. And it is sometimes a weakness. Hmm.. I need to overcome that one day or another. But when I reach my limit... hehehe... better pray that you had paid your insurance fees.

But my patience have been wearing rather thin with the people at work. How can we work efficiently when the bloody sales girls don't even know how to work the fax machine to make it accept faxes? Sadly, I am always surrounded by idiots when it comes to work. They always expect me to save them from their mess. And the company does not pay me enough to tolerate this kind of bullshit. Hah.

But I love my work. I love meeting the people. I love working alongside with senior professionals with more matured minds. I love being the one able to decide which company we should work with and who are the most rewarding partners. I love to hear people telling me that they think I have worked in my job for more than 5 years - because I have the passion for my work, my company's product, my brand name. I love hearing people compliment on me being so young, yet able to carry a post which requires much more experience, and much more seniority in age. And my boss has the cheek to comment in my appraisal saying that 'she does not care for the well -being of the company'.

And I love the people that I had made friends with along the way. Writers and fashion stylists from Cleo, Female, Harpers Bazaar, Vida!, Seventeen, Malaysian Women's Weekly, Her World, Cittabella, Nuyou, Astro, RTM, DiGi, Ambank, Hong Leong Bank, .. ... well, the list goes on. I will definately miss working with them when I leave. Not forgetting my 2 designers whom I worked very close with ever since they came in 10 months ago, Sky and Elly. And, because of my profession, my interest in public relations, and my close friend (Carol), indirectly, I met William at a conference that I would have not attended if I did not receive a call of distress from the project manager handling the ticketing for that conference less than 11 hours before the start of the event.

Because of my close relationship with this particular PR person from Digi, I always get free movie passes from her along with other lavish dinner invitations. She had sent tickets for special screening of movies and I usually go either with Nicky and there was one occassion when I went with Jessica - because there was no other person available and it was very hard to decide who to pick amongst your friends. And I was always reminded of my single-status-ness when a pair of tickets falls out from the yellow printed envelope - and I felt lonely - and then I must think of who would be my next date - and like it or not, if I didn't like that person's attitude, I would have to bear with it until the movie ended. But, in January 2005, this 'mind boggling-ticket-allocation-decision' changed. Even before my fingers rested on the lapel of the envelope, I knew who was coming with me. I knew whom I wanted to share this little gift from my Digi angel. I knew who would definately say yes to my invitation. I knew who I wanted to be with for the entire night. I knew I would definately love his company more than I would love the movie or whatever that happened to be playing on the screen. Simply put - 'Oh.. tickets!.. Hmm.. what time shall I pick him up?'.

... I had a wonderful night. He had dressed scrumptiously for the occassion. I couldn't keep my eyes off him again. I was proud that it was my hand that he was holding and not anyone elses. The 3D movie was short, but I didn't really care what happened, as long I was at his side. To listen to him, to chatter aimlessly with, to see him happy... I enjoyed every second, even if it was just sitting opposite from him at a cosy corner in Dome. I love the communication waves that we share - we could talk for ever and ever, about anything and everything under the sun (or moon). And.. I have not run out of nonsensical topics to tire his ear out ... ...yet.

.. .. Another pair of tickets arrive in the mail last week Monday at the office for a special screening for 'Robots' the new cartoon at Sunway Pyramid. I held on to those tickets. I did not tell anyone I had tickets. Deep in my heart, I wanted to share it with my other half but it was not logically(and physically) possible as he was a gadzillion miles away. I just wanted to .. ... feel that same feeling that I had - 'finally someone is my complete pair'... kinda.. feeling. I wanted to relive those sweet dates we had together. These pair of tickets might mean.. ... 'Oh.. it's just another bribe from DiGi to make sure we give them the best promotions.. pfft' to anyone else, but to me, I believe that these pair of tickets were meant to make more sweet, unforgetable moments for special 'pairs'. And I wouldn't want to go with anyone else except for him. (and it was also because I had tickets to go to that 'Forces of nature' concert that I had PAID for.. - but you know, I might even consider not going for that concert if he were around... RM192 can't buy my happiness and love).

Then on Friday, the day of the movie, I had intended to give it to Elly, to try patch things up with her boyfriend, but.. it seemed that he wasn't around for the special treat. So, I changed my mind.. wouldn't want my pair of tickets to be the firestarter of the end of a relationship. Hehe. So, I turned to the next best happier... urm... gay couple. Sky was depressed that his bf would not let him go to the concert so I thought he needed the movie tickets to soothe things up. Well, Sky seemed much more grateful than Elly.

.. .. It's a nice .. undescribable feeling, you know.. To have this special person, to be your complete 'pair'. And yes, blessings come in many.. many types of wrappings, shapes, sizes, colours, undies size, ribbed or non-ribbed, nylon or cotton... .. *blinks.. *.. (.. earth to Lynn, earth to Lynn.... ) but I believe they always come in pairs.

And my other half's side of the world is now .. nearly 11pm. I do hope he had reached safely. And I am so blessed, to have us as a pair. *muahs*

.. .. .... ... Oh my God... .. He just came online.

w.i.l.l.i.a.m deprived

It's 3:14am... and yes. I just got home recently from that 'Pit Rave'. Well, honestly, I was not enjoying myself. It was full of second hand smoke (duh.. ), full of people that I do not like mingling around with, crappy music (Prodigy SUX big time - they are super duper mega weird beings.. not too sure if they were humans or aliens - but the beats or rhythm of the songs were.. OK la), crappy DJ after that (... well, there were supposed to be 2 djs, but before their arrival - it was already 1am - they played really crappy slow beat hip hop rap sorta junk - then you would have all the monkeys and octopus moving their appendages trying to swat a fly that had gone into the back of their briefs/panties - apparently trying to dance. they should learn how to move first), the crowd was ridiculous (there were like a throng of people, loud, tall, smelly ang mohs, people from our neighbouring country, ... some.. animals too, i think - and all of them were moving through the crowd and somehow, the moving line always appears next to us, and it's so damn irritating when they just push through you like that - not before stepping on your toes and rubbing their sweaty skin on you first - i sometimes would not budge to let them through, but i get defeated by the reeking stench of their breath at times, and I would have to let them pass to keep myself on my feet) and it RAINED.

Yes. But it rained at a good time. I was tired and I was really so lovesick. I was having.. no.. i am having the 'william withdrawal symptom'.. This dreadful illness is when I have not seen my one and only love for ONE weekend - and that equals 2 days - and I can not bear being away from him. Yes. T.W.O D.A.Y.S. 48 hours of not seeing or speaking to him is enough to nullify all efforts of trying to live normally & happilly. I have no words to put down here to describe the emptiness in my heart. It's like.. being a zombie.. ... .. with no... physique to.. .. 'zombie' around. Yes. It is just.. .simply. Hell.

So... .. Siew Lee's shoe got spoilt whilst dancing and then it started raining so thankfully, they decided to call it a night. And it was an outdoor rave. And yes, we walked at least 500 meters in the heavy downpour. And I got drenched. With a sore throat, with a tortured and empty heart, and high heels (which I took off halfway before I simply had no energy to walk and balance myself down the steep slope), I could only make it to the guard house of the KL Towers. I was soaked to the bone, so miserable and I know that William is going to kill me when he reads this. And to top it all up, I was so depressed knowing that I could have spend my night on MSN with William instead of typing this at 3:36am after a rave which I did not need to go which I paid RM45 for.

It was the same as yesterday's concert at the stadium. The line up was fabulous. Black eyed peas did a marvellous job in showing off their individual musical talents, Wyclef Jean made my night without William almost bearable, Boyz 2 Men moved me to watery eyes when they did their popular songs (On bended Knees, Water Runs Dry, A song for Mama) because I really was so william deprived, Backstreet Boys managed to make the ah lians get off their petite arses - not to dance.. noooo... ah lians do not dance.. but instead, they jab the air delicately with their fingers at invisible floating bubbles while moving their scrawny hips to the tempo of 'Negaraku' (Negaraku[national anthem] - very... slow.. beat.. almost to the point of brain dead status on a heart monitor machine) so instead of trying to enter the Guinness World of Records by dancing a proper dance, all they did was whip out their nifty phone cameras (which they might have squeezed out of their whimpy bfs) and starting clicking pictures of the boys. Typical. They have to stock up on their BSB pictures just in case they can't lie anymore to themselves that their bfs are actually 'good looking', so they need the extra go-juice to boost up their sex life.

Lauren Hill was indeed the diva of the night, Jacky Chan was being hillarious, Nicholas Tse and his harem of other anorexic Hong Kong female singers were trying to prove that 'talking very fast, shrilly and in a foreign language' is much better than 'trying to coordinate the microphone while singing so that it would not catch static', and last but not least our 'fantastic' local team of 'mumblers'.. seriously, I could not catch a single word when they were on stage. The only good number they managed to croak out well was 'Innuendo - Belaian Jiwa'.

And Sharmila, was offered a Rm552 ticket, and she chosed me ... out of her closest friends and cousins, to enjoy the better, much more controlled environment at the front seats. I think that was the only delightful moment of the night. But it was short lived as I was suffering from william withdrawal.

I was thinking of whether he had reached his destination safely. Whether he had had his dinner? Whether he had managed to compile notes before the meeting? Whether he had a proper room mate? Whether.. whether.. whether... .. .. all these questions were just playing through my mind the entire night and day and night and day.. and night.. The most I could do was to send countless SMSes. I would have had definately called him if my line could call overseas. I will take a day off from work and settle that problem with Maxis as soon as I can. .. Maybe next Friday. Yes. I shall do it.

I swear, I will never, ever want to go through all that again. I will not choose a shitty Rave over my boyfriend whom I love ever so deeply. And I swear, if he does not come home anytime soon after he gets his degree, I will fly myself there even if I had to knock out an unlucky traveller at the airport to rob him off his flight ticket to Canberra (it would definately be a 'he'. girls might get a little aggressive).

William. You are my life. My love. My everything.

I love you.

n.i.n.e.t.e.e.n.t.h

I have just got home from the 'Force of Nature' Charity Concert.. and it's... 4:22am. Yes, I will update everyone about the 7 hours.. thing.

I just wanted to post that today (or this morning) marks the 2nd month anniversary since William and I got together. It was approximately 1am, two months ago, 19th of January, 2005, when I cornered him and made him stutter his way through a very interesting confession...

... .. I just miss him. I hope he is doing well.

.. . Will sleep my weekend away.

c.e.l.e.b.r.@.t.i.o.n of the dec@de

It's the 18th of March, Sharmila's 23rd birthday. !!!!


* the end to all days, the maniacal LAWYER has graduated! *

~an original p@ssion-@rt

(..yay yay, I'm only 22.. )
*... .. and 3 months, 1 day exactly*
.. ... .... . shhusshh..

Let me brief all of you on my 2 partners in crime. We have known each other for... .. since primary 5, so that's.. 13 years!!!!!.... That's... Damn.... a very long time!.. That's.. 13 years of.. nonsense and naked guys chit chat and fantasizing!.. 13 years of lonely new years celebrated together with a box of pizza (with extra cheese for that added fatty indulgence..!.. ahh.. how comforting.. ) , KFC, and... some.. gay anime with.. animals of the zodiac!... (.. yes.. sad to say, gay guys that changes into animals when hugged by the opposite sex are kinda cute. Go watch Fruits Basket. I like the Dragon - which in fact is a seahorse - reminds me much of William.. the innocent face.. baby boy look.. yummy lips.. .. thoughtful .. dreamy kinda person on the outside.. but a 'Dragon' inside... rawr rawr... ) . We have shared dirtyyyy secrets.. (about... gay anime guys, sexy carribean pirates - who... might be gay, leader of gay hobbits... Yeah. we had a sad love life.. umm.. close to.. null), personal takes on the evil, pathetic breed of 'man'kind, oogled over Final Fantasy 7 .. until Final Fantasy 11. Oh.. My... .. that's like... 5 generations of Final Fantasy..from 2D to 3D... .. Gawd.... We Are Ancient!!!!!

They, my beloved bestest girlmates, Jessica and Sharmila, have been with me throughout my entire 'growing' up period of my life. They were there when I cried in school when Mother had announced our family separation, they were there when we tried to make ... bread.. over a measly fire made up of pathetic sticks and some.. dust.. or.. weed.. with some... .. coconut oil - courtesy of Sharm's dad (i looked at sharm and asked "coconut oil???? where on earth do we find coconut oil????".. yes.. and the reply was obviously.. the obvious "Urrrr.... in a coconut???" - and the bread turned out..... rather .... .sticky.. doughy.. tasty.. i think. .. we never cared about how food tastes like when we were young, as long as it fits into your mouth - and if it doesn't fit, try again after nibbling off the excess sides) - in our primary school compound, outside our class. (yeah.. talk about outdoor activities.. it's... outside classroom activities... *ppfftt*).

I have watched them harass and molest a stalk of sugar cane to the ground. (seriously, literally). They were practically stomping the life out (well, i think Jess killed it already when she laid her evil hands on it.. i think she yanked it out of the ground.. or.. something.. maybe with the help of her foot and mangling skills) of the poor innocent plant with their ..chalk covered, white (or ash grey without the chalk - white chalk is essential in avoiding being caught by prefects (aka me) for having dirty shoes. Yesss... i was the butler and maid of the school at one sad point in my life). They were bending, twisting, demolishing, ravishing, mutilating and .. .. oh it was pure evil.

And they were E.N.J.O.Y.I.N.G it. You could actually see the red horns and tails peeking out from their heads and bums (if you listened close enough, you can even hear the faint shrieks of laughter and 'Die .. Die... Die... you are MMINEEEE SUGGARR CANNEEEE!!!'.. ). After their very rough gang bang with the sugar.. cane.. or whatever was left of it, they sat there.. with the 2 broken pieces of cane ever so peaceful and so.... mantra.. calming like.. like.. nirvana..

And WHY did they do it?..

Simply put (and the obvious... again) Jessica wanted to munch on the sugar cane.

*yeaaaaa.. after all the stomping and mulching and.. whatever else that came intact with the soles of their shoes... yeaaa... go right on and munch on it babbbbeess.. *

And I watched them gnaw happilly on their treat (yarrr.. you should have seen the way Jess was handling it - it was as if she was forcing a struggling.. .. iguana into her mouth filled with evil.. ... blood..dripping.. fangs). And I could feel their satisfaction radiating out of their evil pores.

But I think I was the one who introduced 'evil'-ness into their lives at one point in time. Can't remember how, though. But they were the 'good' girls... um.. so called lar. I guess I was more 'evil' in a way that I was more exposed to the real world sorta thing. I had my freedom, my parents didn't give me curfews. I had my independance, I managed to get my own meals at my own times and I was just left to fend for myself - be it exams or studies or peer pressure.. (i had. not much peer pressure actually, it was pretty simple, my status in school - I was a bitch and everyone hated my guts.. hehe. simple!). I then managed to built up this shield, to keep my real self (who is much much much more vulnerable than what most people see), safe from the evil people and evil stuff. And I became... who I am now, today.

And the only person, whom I had let my defences waiver when he's around, is...( Yes.. of course you know.. A free breath of oxygen (while stocks on earth lasts) for the correct answer.. ).. my darling love. He's in the shower now by the way.

*evil, nasty, sexy thoughts.. hmmm... shower.. *..

*blinks.. blinks*.... What...?? I have all rights to fantasize about my loverboy anytime and anyhow I want!..

.. .. .. I seriously think it's the Fisherman's Friend Apple and Cinnamon lozenges that he had asked me to buy to cure my sore throat. .. ... .... It's giving me weird urges. Not to mention that Elly and I had indulged our eyes and minds with really sexy, cute, hunks pictures on Sky's computer.... ...

Oh... Now I see.... .. ... it's a slow torture to insanity.. yesssss... it's a evil, mean trick to get me high whilst he is away!!!!...
*.. .. poutssss*...

Nevermind, will satisfy my thirst and hunger with more Fisherman's Friend...

.. .. ... ... and who or what is a Fisherman's Friend??? ???

Happy Birthday, Sharmila... .. I hope you'd enjoy the lovely surprise that we have in store for you... (and yeah... i am still gonna get that short skirt from Top Shop.. no matter how much your ticket isss!!!)

*muahs muahs*

No O.n.e Else

No one else,
Can make me laugh..
And then make me cry.

No one else,
Makes me feel
So alive in my world.

In my world,
I desire,
Only you.

Our souls are locked,
Together as one.
Now and forever,
You are my love.

~Lynn 2005

s.w.e.e.t l@ughter of love

Just ended a phone conversation with my love.. and oh I do love him so. He did call me a few days ago, and I was really so grateful and touched and... just felt so remembered.. all the way from Canberra. It is another special moment which I cling on to, to help me go through my days.. and that makes every moment in love with him so special. I would cuddle the furry bear that he gave me for Valentine's (.. yes... I know it's 'common'.. but it's just so meaningful to me.. It's the first significant gift presented to me from someone who really loves me for who I really am. And really do appreciate and love all the effort and thoughts to procure this particular bear. And I named it 'Bear Bear'.. .. ... .. cause... I think... . the name suits.. the bear.) while talking to him on my hand phone. (coincidentally, the same brand, Samsung, as he has. That's why even though the retarded thing goes on and off for a while, I still hang on to it, with all it's... weird... PMS'es.. and.. mood swings.. *blinks*.. just like the owner la.. )

I would picture his deep laughs, his smiles, his gentle touch, his little teasings... his stares.. (yes, he stares... he STARES at me.. when I'm driving, when I'm fiddling with my nails, when I'm nibbling on chocolate, when there is a fork halfway towards my mouth.. yes.. he would stare.. and I got used to it, and then he'd smile.. and i'd ask 'what what wwhhaattt?'... and yea... he'd still smile.. and tell me the obvious 'What..?... I'm staring at you... '...and then he'll smile that smile that would always, always makes my knees so weak .. . And I rather... like it.. which is rather weird 'cause i can't stand people staring at me. But with him staring.. I feel so.. special. .. ... .. okay.. i have no idea to put all these feelings in words... !... but yea... urm... i hope u get the idea..) , his soft words, his playfulness, his bashful-innocent-schoolboy-look.. (and you know how deep I am into school boys, school teachers yarrr?..... *winks*... Uh-hmmm.. *slurps*).

And then... I'd miss him all over again when we get off the phone. And I really do look forward to the next day being in love.. and the next.. and the next.. *mushy lovey dovey sigghssss*.

He'll be gone for the weekend... to Melbourne to do some work and some meetings. And I, have planned it all in advance. *ahem*

Plans to keep myself occupied so not to miss loverboy too much

1. Go to 'Force of Nature' Charity Concert at Putra Stadium,
Bukit Jalil.

- Backstreet Boys, U2, Black Eyed Peas, Faith Hill, Jacky Chan and a few other pop stars would be there. I suspect that they would only sing ONE miserable song (cause the concert is for charity to raise funds for Tsunami, and although it's for a good cause and all of that, time is still money for these big shots) and then the rest of the time the local singers would take over... Oh God I pray that would NOT happen.

- MY mum is coming. But she (arghhhh... lucky devil sheeee!!!!) has the RM552 tickets but she only bought them for Rm82.. !!!!!!!!..... .. And yes, my mum is a healthy age of 56 and she loves the Black Eyed Peas. She ROXX.. My Dearest Mother (who has 6 pierced holes on her right ear, 3 on her left ear, and she wanted to get one on her nose, I refused! - because it's a bit embarassing that the daughter is a scaredy cat to get one with her. .. miu miu.. but no fear, I will tell you all about the funkiest mum on earth later on in another posting).

- And I, have the RM 192 ticket which I bought like... last week for a surprise for my best friend, Sharmila. Yessss... we (me and her cousin, Sheila, who flew all the way down from Sabah (.. Sabah[state] - urm.... ... ... lots more sadder than where i am now..hehe - no wonder she wanted to come down QUICK) told her that we would be taking her out for a birthday dinner tomorrow (18th March, Friday) but actually taking her to the concert!... (and yeah.. there goes my 200 dollars I was saving up to buy that tiny, micro, mini Top Shop skirt... *sobs sobs*... ).

2. KL Tower Rave Party
(... ... . no other details... .. um... yea.. don't know at all)

-Yes.. it's the tallest tower in the world.. well.. not anymore since that Japanese tower.. thingy got constructed.. (Yarrrrr..... they added a super mighty long antenna to it... cheaters!!!!!).. Yar... and there's going to be a rave.. .. at the top of it?... Hmmmmm .. that.. i am not too sure. but yes, will be going with my hardcore clubbing buddy, Hsiang Yi. She called up one day ...

Hand Phone call scenario

H : "Yo, Miao! (yes.. my close friends call me Miao... don't ask),
wannnagotoraveatkltoweronsaturday??"

L : "Huh?? (trying to break the sound barrier on the highway),
wannagoto-what-ravewasthatagaaainn? ... saturday-yousay?"

H : "yesssssornnooo?"

L : "eerrrr... yeaaaaaaa
(concentration disrupted by cute guy in nice black car next to me, slowing down a notch to take a closer look..... ... not THAT close, Lynn... )
i gueesssooo. bbuttwwhhaatttimmee? howwee gonnna get there???? "

H : "ookkkk... bought the tickets already..!!!!
seeyasaturddaaayyyyyyy!!"..

*click.. toot.. tooot... toooooooot*

L : "huh..???? wha?????"...

*blinks.. shrugs*... Now where that guy ar... ?

Yesssss.... I have very.... enthusiastic friends.. and I have 2 plans to keep me busy for the 2 days of weekend... .. *thinks.. thinks*

.. ... and I think I'll catch up on rest on Sunday. Hmm.. hmm.. you know lor.. all that nice bums to look at and all that dancing to heat up the dance floor... .. all very energy consuming you know.. and well, I am not that 'young' anymore...

But I would still be missing my darling..

*hye he he he he... and he would be sitting in a dull meeting... .. *..

*blinks.. ... blinks... tries to look innocent*... But I still love him. Very Much.

*nods nods*... And I know you guys are BORED of listening to my neverending rantings about my dearest loverboy and all that, here is a little picture of him and myself, which we took at Genting on our first... .. urm.. ... honey.. ... . -date ?... .. .. Go figure.


*portrait of my wubbie and I*

~an original p@ssion-@rt